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Barks N Bits with Bella ® Muncie, Indiana

Barks N Bits w/ Bella

Sreiously?? You think that's funny?

by Bella on 10/03/17

Life is NEVER dull - or quiet - around here at the ranch. Sometimes I think that I get more rest when we are on the road somewhere at a horse show or rodeo. I can guarantee you that a quiet day around here is very hard to come by.

A classic example of a “typical day” here at the ranch could include an  unlimited supply of cars and trucks pulling in and out of the driveway, these will almost always get a few barks from the outside dogs, probably a few
from your truly and definitely a barking remix from the Princess.

The vehicle induced barking is just the tip of the decible iceberg. When the people take us (me and Annie) outside to feed the horses first thing in the morning, our visit includes a “Good Morning” nicker from most every
horse on the property. Our visit to the barn also gets the standard laugh from the ranch’s latest animal authority on obnoxiousness, Seven the donkey. He would most likely outdo the “little black bark box” in my book if I had to bring him in the house too. He laughs at everything!

Of course, he has the most annoying and loud laugh I have ever heard. Heeeeee Haw Haw Haw Haw....Heeeeeeeee Haw Haw Haw. I mean, come on.....really? Who laughs like that?

Seven has became a topic of laughter from all points of view, but none get as many laughs as the donkey himself. But I can assure you that most of the time, I just don’t get it. Honestly, I think Seven just has a twisted sense of humor. Most of the things he laughs about are “incidents” created by the little pot stirring donkey himself.

He has created quite a name among the visitors here at the ranch. (I think “Court Jester” would be a fitting.) His antics have already included several escapes, chasing dogs and cars (yes, I said it) and aggravating horses every chance he gets. He likes to pull on the horses’ tails, he doesn’t chew on them....
just grabs them with his mouth and then pulls. Some of the horses don’t get his “jokes” either....and they usually let him know right away that he isn’t as funny as he thinks. Some just tolerate him....I call them his enablers!

As for me, I refuse to encourage his ridiculous behavior. He is just a prank playing, loud laughing, ego-maniac who likes to be the center of attention.
What’s so funny about that?

Until next month....
Keep it down.......

On the Road Again

by Bella on 08/02/17

Break time is over for me and we are on the road again. My family does a lot of
travelling with the horses and I almost always have to go and help out. It’s really not so bad. To tell you the truth, I kind of like my “windshield time.” I’m becoming quite the pro when it comes to watching for critters on the highway.

As long as I can see where I am going, I do just great. I can’t say the same for the “Princess.”

When she gets to tag along on a road trip, she doesn’t help at all. It never  fails...I get to handle the critter watch all on my own while she is sawing logs in the back seat under a blanket. It’s really kind of sad. I just don’t think there is any hope for that girl. The only time she wakes up is when we make a stop and
there is potential for a snack from some fast food drive-thru.

Last week we took off to a horse show with the trailer in tow and drove a couple
of hours to get to our destination.

Do you think the snoozing little sausage offered to give me a break from the controls?

Why, of course not. It was all me, all the way, baby. She spent her time counting sheep while I made sure the boss didn’t run over any on the highway.

We made it to the show grounds safe and sound (pat on back for Bella here...) and while the people took car of horses, I decided to take a nap. Little did I know that my nap would be short lived. Our Precious little Princess had found her bark box and was using it. I thought she had outgrown the “bark at anything that moves” stage. I was wrong. The people tell her, “Annie, you hush!” And it seems like she just has to have the last word.

The conversation goes something like this: Annie: “Bark, Bark, Bark!!!”

People: Annie, hush!”

Annie: “Bark, Bark! Growl...”

People: “Annie! Be quiet!”

Annie: “Bark......Bark, Bark.”

People: “Ooooh, that dog!!”

Annie: “Bark..........Bark.”

People: “Annabelle!! Hush!!!

Annie: “Bark.”

People: “Why can’t you behave like Bella?

And there it is.......my conformation. Of course, I already know....but it is so nice to hear it on occasion. One good thing about having the little black bark box in my shadow..... makes me look better all the time!

Until next month....
Lookin’ Good.......

Everyone Needs A Break...

by Bella on 06/07/17

After my last report, things got very interesting, to say the least. The new addition at the ranch - now named “Seven” - was fitting in quite nicely. He
was getting lots of laughs with his never ending antics and making new friends with some of the horses around the ranch.

One of the donkey’s favorite things to do after his arrival was hang out with this particular bay mare. (I think he had a little donkey crush on her.) He followed her around everywhere and it got so bad that when the bay mare was getting ridden by the people, the donkey would follow them through the patterns. While she was galloping for her exercise he would sometimes be right on her heels!

One time he was following her so close at a walk, when the person said “Whoa” and the bay mare stopped....Seven didn’t hit the brakes in time and ended up between her back legs! He’s lucky that bay mare was in a good mood that day!

“Seven” the mini-donkey has since been forbidden from the arena during training time for the big horses and the bay mare has since went home for a break. Seven has found a new friend to pester when he gets a chance. His new friend is a big sorrel gelding. The sorrel gelding doesn’t mind Seven following him around for the most part, but every now and then he needs a break from the donkey’s aggravating ways.

I know how he feels. Sometimes I just need a break from the little black bark box (Princess Annabelle.) That’s when my people take me on a trip to the lake. They must have some kind of sixth sense and know just the right time to get me out of here before I lose it. When the donkey started chasing cars it almost sent me over the edge and that must have been a great clue for them to get me “outta Dodge” and head south to the lake.

I have to say that I really love the lake! To tell you the truth, I think the people kind of like it too. They seem to enjoy themselves while they are entertaining me. I love the peace and quiet, no responsibilities and of course, I’m the only critter that gets to go....so no Aggravating Annie.

I like everything including the ride in the car where I get to sit in the middle
and watch for critters in the road. The people take me out to ride in the boat and let me lounge on the tube on the water. Then they play around and splash and drive the boat fast, I don’t complain.... the least that I can do is let them have their fun since they make this special trip so I can have some rest.

Now that I am rested and rejuvenated.....it’s back to the ranch to try to regain some order.

Until next month....
Take A Break.....I did.....
Bella

Is There Really Such A Thing As "Normal?"

by Bella on 03/01/17

I’d like to let you in on how the past month has went for yours truly. If there is such a thing as a “normal” month (let alone day) I have definitely NOT had one.

It all started with the addition of a new creature here at the ranch. I was out minding my own business, probably catching mice or running off other unwanted varmits when I heard a commotion in the barn lot.

A trailer had arrived and I heard all of the outside dogs carrying on as usual. (And of course the little black bark box had to put in her two cents.) I headed over to find out what all of the fuss was about. You see, a trailer isn’t that much news around here, but this smelled a little different than your usual everyday, run of the mill “horse” trailer. There was something a little different going on and was I ever surprised to find out what was about to be unloaded from this funny smelling trailer.

The fella that was driving the truck made his way to the back of the trailer and before he could open the door, I heard the most awful sound, something I had never heard before....and I’ve been a lot of places in all my dog years! I was actually a little scared to see what was going to emerge from this smelly...and now noisy trailer. At that point I was hoping that whatever it was....it was fond of Jack Russel dogs.

When the man opened the door, there it stood.....a ball of fur about the size of the neighbor dog, Duke. I couldn’t see it’s eyes (to be honest, I wasn’t sure if it had any.) It looked a lot like a miniature version of the big horses that the people around here spend alot of time riding....but there was no way they would be able to ride this scrawny thing! To top it all off it has the longest ears I have ever seen...and they stood up straight - all on their own!!! They didn’t fall over and flop around like Princess Annabelle’s ears always do. So strange!

And then as I was checking out this odd little creature - from a safe distance of course - it let out that strange sound again. This time it sounded like “Yee Haw.” I figured maybe the critter thought it should try to fit in at the ranch and hollar like a cowboy.

As I looked around, all of the people were laughing. I kind of felt sorry for the little guy, who’s eyes were now showing through the fur on his face. The lady of the ranch took the time to brush him a little and I heard her call him a donkey.  Finally - the new critter had been identified....a donkey.....and a miniature one at that!!

This should get interesting.....
To be continued........
Until next month....
“Yee Haw!!!"
Your favorite Jack Russel Terrier...
Bella

Another Flashback to 20111 - I REPEAT: “Rain, Rain, GO AWAY!!

by Bella on 01/04/17

Last month in the May issue, I took the time to introduce you to the rest of the doggie-crew here at the ranch because the rain had kept us from having too many adventures....and it seems that hasn’t changed much as I write this month’s article. The introductions may come in handy as you continue reading. I’ve had to do some serious concentrating here at the ranch to get some material and believe it or not, it wasn’t that hard once I started looking around at these other creatures who live here with me.
We’ll start with a funny story about our little Princess....
Here at the ranch we have an arena that is meant for horse riding and training. It is usually nice and soft and worked up for the horses, however this is not a good mix after a downpour of rain. “Miss Priss” found this out as she went for a stroll out around the second barrel the other day after a torrential rain had left water standing everywhere.
Miss Annabelle with the extra wide and extra long body and the super short legs got part of the way into her stroll and realized that she was stuck. Think of Woolly mammoths in a tar pit...... that paints a pretty good picture of the situation Little Miss “Thang” had gotten herself into. She would try to lift a foot and realize each time that her belly was already pressed into the mud too far to
make any kind of attempt at escape. I really hate to admit it, but I have to give the little diva some credit.... She didn’t put too much effort into her escape before she gave out a sharp “YIP.”
You realize Woolly mammoths are extinct, right? I think it was because they never learned how to “YIP” just right. Had they learned the “YIP” and had they trained a person to come at said “YIP,” they may still be around.
You see, Annie has a person who carries her around like a baby. And as soon as Annie made a plea for help....her help came running.... right through the mud. Her person almost got stuck in the mud while rescuing the little mud-covered wiener. They both came out of the incident a mess. Princess Annabelle came out with legs that looked like tree trunks because they were caked with the mud and her hero almost lost a boot more than once during the ordeal - and of course was then covered in mud after carrying the little mudball to safety.
I’m not sure what the moral of this story is or if there is one, except that everyone needs a good laugh now and then.....and I got one that day.
Until next month....
I’ll be working on my “YIP.”
Bella

A Puppy in a Cowboy Hat
Isn't that just the cutest thing you've ever seen?  Yes, that is me as a cute little ball of puppy fur and puppy kisses.  This picture was taken the week that I met my family.  I had left Georgia and made my way to Ft Smith, Arkansas where my new family picked me up and then brought me to this marvelous place where I live now...Indiana.
Princess Annabelle
This is the reason I write.  I had to start letting off steam somewhere, somehow.  When this precious little bark-box came into my life, everything changed.  I guess you could say she brought out the best in me.  You could say that.  Anyway - if you're trying to catch up on the Who, What, Where and When....she is part of the "Who."  (And not the rock band.)
Books in the Works...
It's finally happening!  I'm going to put together some books to share my adventures.  I thought I's give you a sneak peek of what is to come. Do you remember Seven the donkey?  (Artwork by Vicki Piebenga)

​Our visit to the barn gets the standard laugh from the ranch’s latest animal authority on obnoxiousness, Seven, the donkey.  He would most likely outdo Annabelle, "little black bark box" in my book if I had to bring him in the house too.  He laughs at everything!

Of course, he has the most annoying and loud laugh I have ever heard. Heeeeee Haw Haw Haw Haw....Heeeeeeeee Haw Haw Haw. I mean, come on.....really? Who laughs like that?

Seven has became a topic of laughter from all points of view, but none get as many laughs as the donkey himself. I can assure you that most of the time, I just don’t get it.

Honestly, I think Seven just has a twisted sense of humor. Most of the things he laughs about are “incidents” created by the little pot stirring donkey himself.

Excerpt from Barks N Bits, October 2011
"Bell"a
My cleverness has caught up with me and bit me in the booty. I thought I was being sly and capitalizing on the people thinking I was losing my hearing....well, they decided that in order to keep track of me, I should wear a bell for them to hear.  Read More....

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